Normally I spend the first month away from home quite miserable until I start to feel more local in my new situation. That hasn't really happened this time and I think mostly due to the fact I am travelling with my immediate family, my husband and daughter. Almost everything to date has felt like an adventure; I haven't been comparing everything to home or questioning why I left or waiting for the first month to be over as I know about this period I go through.
Today was the first time I could really describe myself as homesick. Both my husband, Kevin, and I are from quite closeknit families where we see or talk to each other regularly. It took us two weeks after arriving in Sundsvall to make it onto Skype with our parents. Due to our lack of internet, I hadn't even known my Dad had travelled to another country during that time. That was weird, and I felt quite isolated.
It also really has started to hit home about our lack of support. Our 13 months old daughter has started to hit the "terrible twos" (yes she is quite the overachiever). I think there's so many new things and she might be starting to realize we're not going "home" so it is overwhelming her. Also her awareness of the surrounding world has visibly increased in the last couple weeks alongside her frustration of not being able to express her desires. It has led to quite a few temper tantrums recently. At home we're quite spoiled, in that if we're frustrated or tired there's always a grandparent, aunt or uncle to help out, spend some time with Beth and let us regain our sanity. Yesterday there was just Kevin and I, trading off, trying to stop the screaming. Let me assure you, very little sanity left. I didn't really think about it until a friend turned up to go for a walk and Beth stopped, giggled and smiled. Apparently that novelty of it not being grumpy Mom or Dad was enough to make her feel better.
I miss having those people around who are automatically going to help Beth feel happy, loved and secure. I also miss the help and support that keep Kevin and I sane as we navigate this new world as parents (and who provide lovely babysitting services for us gratis). I know over time we can and will build that community here, but the realization of how much we've left behind is a bit hard today.
So if my family is reading this, I appreciate you, miss you and love you.
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